Second Breakfast

Dust devils spring clean Martian rover

CNN: Mars rover gets new lease on life

Well, maybe the mystery is solved on the whole “why the Mars rovers’ solar panels get cleaned off on a regular basis” story. I’m still holding out for the “Martian natives at traffic lights with squee-gees” theory. Perhaps we’d get better performance out of the rovers if we sent them up with some spare change.

Either that, or its those filthy Jawas.

Yahoo! News - Ex-WorldCom Chief Ebbers Convicted of Fraud

‘Bout frigging time. Being a former employee of WorldCon, I have some experience with the management culture that Ebbers and company cultivated. I’m glad that his “Oh, I’m just a simple cave-man. I don’t know nuthin’ ’bout no accountin’ stuff” line of bullshit didn’t fly.

Ebbers is in his 60s, and the convictions carry a maximum penalty of 85 years in prison. Even with the judge’s sentencing discretion, that seems like a good, long time to meditate on the dangers of hubris, arrogance, and greed. Hopefully he won’t spend the next three years sunning his sorry ass in Club Fed.

The Register reports that Beer not fattening: official. This result was determined by the British Beer and Pub Association (BBPA), so you can be sure that it was completely unbiased in its methodology.

This is relieving, as I was concerned that my gut was the result of my weekly indulging on my favorite ales. Apparently I was wrong — apparently its that big glass of Florida’s Natural I down every morning with my Citrucel.

Student in High School zombie terror threat | The Register

I kid you not. This poor kid writes a story about zombies taking over his high school, and they put him in jail. Zombies! So my question is, Mister Ashcroft, how exactly was this kid supposed to have the means to carry out this terrible plan? Is there something we don’t know? Are you keeping a zombie army hidden somewhere? A vial of Rage virus that somehow “went missing”?

Someone needs to get a reality check. We’re so terrified about everyone being “safe” that we’re losing our minds, or at least good judgement.

Speaking of Zombies, here is a cool Zombie Infection Simulator written in Java. Think “28 Days Later” but will little pink and grey dots.

BrightCoop E-Z Catch Harvester

This mildly-disturbing bit of animal husbandry brought to you by Gizmodo.com.

For our readers of farming stock, “Life just got easier,” thanks to Bright Coop’s new E-Z Catch Chicken Harvester. Essentially a vacuum for chickens, this device sucks the wayward birds into its clutches to be quickly filed away into their open coop. The Harvester features adjustable rotating drums, allowing compensation for chickens of all sizes. Bright Coop goes the extra mile with a wholly disturbing video of their Harvester in action. Watch as the operator mows over dozens of chickens and sends them back to their coops, relatively intact.